Trust is a tricky topic of discussion. People always assume that Trust is something full of absolutes: If a person is like this and that then they are trustworthy, and if they aren’t then they are not. But when you think about it, what qualifies as trustworthy traits is very subjective, what may seem like good traits to you may not mean much to me, and vice versa.
For example, I know some people are big on knowing passwords to devices like phones and laptops. Personally, I think that’s more to cater to their insecurities than a sign of actual trust. How does knowing your significant other’s password help you trust them more? if they still wanted to do dirt on the side they could, it’s nothing to delete an email, a phone call or a text message. For me it’s the subtle things that count. If I wanted to shoot a glance over her shoulder while she texts, is she going to pull away and accuse me of being nosey? Does she go into another room to take a phone call? It’s things like that that lets me know what may really be up.
Another thing that I don’t quite understand is the whole “key to their place” theory. Because nothing says “You should trust me” like unmonitored access to my house?? I’ve always been of the “If I pay for it, then I have access to it” mindset. If you’re helping to pay rent, paying my phone bill, and paying for the wifi, then you can get a key, and as many passwords as you desire. If not, it shouldn’t be brought up as a display of “trust.”
Like I said, I really think that trust is subjective and if a person can meet some common qualifications then I don’t see a reason to not trust them. For example, If I know that I don’t have to check in on my girl’s whereabouts every 2 hours or so just to make sure she is where she says she is, then that gives me reason to trust her. If she goes out to a club or a party, and I don’t hear anything along the lines of “She was acting like she didn’t have a man” then that gives me reason to trust her. Anything outside of having them show respect for being in a relationship just seems a little excessive to me.
But what about you guys? What type of actions do you think qualifies or disqualifies a significant other from being considered trustworthy? Feel free to post your comments.
